Tomorrow you turn ONE. Letter to Felix

Felix, my tiny one,

I can hardly believe that tomorrow you turn one. I feel like time usually passes so quickly and I should be saying "where has that year gone?" In your case I really can't believe you are about to be a year old but not because of the speed of time. For too many of those days I truly didn't believe we would get here and that Felix has made this year VERY long….

You turned life as we knew it on its head. This time last year I was in hospital waiting for labour to start. I had visions of baby boy number 2 and how you would just "slot right in" to our world. You never slotted right in. You came into the world in the most dramatic of styles and that's the way our lives have been ever since.

You have the most wonderful strength and determination about you Felix. We all joke about how you are such a feisty little thing. How you are the grumpy one. None of it is true though. You are strong willed and you know what you want but I truly believe that you wouldn't be here if you didn't have that fire in you. You are also one of the most sensitive babies I know. You have always needed your mummy close by. You hug me so tight when we have been apart for even the shortest amount of time and it truly melts my heart.

We missed allot of firsts with you little one. Daddy never got to see you arrive, I had to ask if I was allowed to touch you through that noisy plastic box, something no new mum should have to ask. Your first experience of life outside me was needles, machines and doctors. But then you came home and you've never really left my side since so we more than made up for it didn't we?

We've had lots of happy times this year. We have watched you grow from a tiny little dot to a crazy “into everything” little boy and you have exceeded our expectations with your milestones. Most of all you have taught us to remember just how fragile life is and how lucky and blessed we are to have you here with us. I've said a quiet thank you each and every morning that I get you out of your cot.

Tomorrow is a day to celebrate everything that is you and believe me we will! I am so emotional about the fact you are turning 1 but that emotion is nearly all relief. YOU DID IT! WE DID IT! Tomorrow is the day that we say goodbye to your 1st year and say hello to a brand new exciting 2nd year. The year where we will see you transition from a baby to a toddler. We are going to have so many adventures and we have so many exciting things to show you.

So little Felix, thank you. Thank you for brightening our world and making us see life in a whole new way. Most of all thank you for being you. I am so very very proud of you.

All my love

Mummy xxx